Lonesome

I've tried to not be negative in my entries. We really do love our place and are so happy that we made this move. We've worked hard to build and create a place where we can be comfortable and where family and friends can too. It's been a labor of love and joy. The idea of moving to the jungle and living off-grid, where we aren't hostage to an unreliable infrastructure has really been satisfying. I'm still not going to tell our ages, but I'm sure we're older than most folks who have made a similar move. We just feel that you're never too old to dream and accomplish.

One thing that we've found here, and I'm sure it's probably the same in most of Central America, if not the world, is that folks move here for lots of different reasons. Many from the US are frustrated with the government and have very negative attitudes. Some are literally running away from legal problems and lots just want to hide. We're here mostly for economic reasons. We haven't been able to sell our house in Oregon and we can't afford to live there on our retirement income. We can afford to live in Belize, even with our current repair expenses. This is a very sad commentary on the current economy. The recent census reports from both the US and Belize found the widest gap possibly ever, between the haves and the have-nots. I doubt that there's much of a middle class left. We do have a very small circle of wonderful friends here who share some of our interests and concerns.

Our problem is that, we knew that we'd miss our family, but had hopes that they could come down and we could manage to go up there periodically. The reality is that the economy has stripped all of us out of any expendable income. We're all just struggling to survive. We miss so much being even a little involved with our grandchildren's lives. They're growing up so fast. Our daughter's two boys, Quiet Max, our oldest will turn 15 the end of this month. He's a sophomore in high school and loves his classes, especially algebra. Tyler, 13 is in the 8th grade and is our talker. He's finally having a good time in school and can't decide whether he wants to go out for the school play or basketball. We're hoping for the play as he isn't exactly a Wilt Chamberlain. He has enthusiasm tho', so will put his all into whichever he chooses. We've lived near them their whole lives, so our move has been difficult for all of us.

Our son has three children. They live about 5 hours away from us, in Washinton State. Rex is 14 and is a terrific student. He's so smart,loves to read and has such abilities. Hope he taps into them. Charlie, 12 is definitely his own person. He's taking Judo and loves it. None of them communicate much, but he wrote that he broke his collarbone, but no information. Kids! Then there's our beautiful Jessie May. She's 7 (or is it 8? I'm sorry Jessie, you're growing up so fast). There's no question that she's a girl. She loves pink and is so bright and loving. Our son just remarried to a wonderful lady. We're so happy for them, but sad that we don't get to be involved in their lives even a little bit.

Then there's my wonderful brother & sister-in-law. I miss his creativity and sharing our life experiences. His lovely wife, Jan is such a blessing in all our lives. They've been so supportive, even about our crazy move. They never fail to keep touch via phone or email.

The crux of all this is that, if we could sell this place, we'd move back. The separation is just too difficult. We do enjoy and appreciate our Belizean neighbors, but, no matter what, there'll always be an unfillable gap because we're Gringos. Our experiences are so totally different. I'll always be "Miss Gale", which makes me slightly uncomfortable. I know it's similar to using Mrs. but still makes me feel different.

Because of our financial worries, we've put both places up for sale hoping that one will sell soon. Then we'll be able to figure out where our future lies. For now,we're loving our place and continuing to maintain and improve it as we can.

Never quit dreaming.